Thursday, November 06, 2014

Gobal Beliefs And Codependency

Global Beliefs as Boundaries 

BThe choice of words Tony Robbins used to describe what he terms "Global Beliefs" was coined in the pre codependency days. Way back in 1990 John Bradshaw and Melody Beattie had not yet made Codependency a household word.

Boundaries as described by Codependency

Boundaries, in the context of Codependency and Family Systems Theory are, in essence the same thing Tony Robbins was addressing (before there was a context or framework to view this concept within)

Boundaries are from the perspective of a codependent a failure to speak up or defend oneself when one is insulted. Folks with unhealthy boundaries permit themselves to be manipulated.. and don't seem to see it coming and this manipulation keeps happening over and over again.

If one does have healthy boundaries, one realizes You Can Not Be Manipulated without first being maniplatABLE.

fool me once, shame on you, fool me 16 times consecutively and I have some kind of irrational secondary gain my sub conscious seems to want me to suffer

.. almost an irrational atonement for a skewed sense of self deprecation.

The neat thing about Tony Robbins idea fits into this as follows:

In codependency people confuse their malady as their identity
a healthy person walks up to you and identifies themselves like this, "I'm Sally"
a codependent identifies themselves as "I'm depressed" or "I'm so tired of this... x"

Self talk and how that is damaging is a separate blog post... but the things you say to yourself are indicators of how you evaluate yourself and are indicative of what ever your boundaries are "set for"

Describing a Ship by the wake it leaves in the water

a fish can't see the fishbowl
Boundaries are the filter or prism by which all coming stimulus is pre judged

One reason boundaries are so hard to wrap your mind around is... the only people who are interested in the topic is people who are repeatedly getting manipulated.